Just A Rambling Update

Yes, I cheated on my liquid diet. I felt (and still feel) guilty about it. After beating myself up over it, perusing the internet for information about cheating, and sticking to the liquid diet religiously, I was cleared of all charges by my surgeon today. He didn’t seem to care, just “tsk-tsked” me in a jolly manner and said, “Don’t do it again.” I have also lost 18 pounds since I started, so I don’t think he’s overly concerned about fatty liver.

However, I’m hearing conflicting stories from various Lap Banders on the web and in the clinic that still make me fearful for Friday. Some people have said that the surgeons can and will change their minds about placing a band if they see that your liver hasn’t shrunk. Some people say that they don’t care. Some people have to do 2-3 week liquid diets and some don’t. Some people cheated and some (whom I hate reading about because they sound like smug assholes) didn’t. It’s all a big muddle of information and I think I’m working myself up into a frenzy over it. I should probably stop actively seeking this stuff out and reading it. I’m already high strung from living on liquids for a week or so. It would be nice, however, if the medical community got together and actually made some across the board guidelines on what a pre-Lap bander should do. I guess that makes too much sense though.

So yeah. I’m sticking to my diet now and have been losing almost two pounds a day. I have had people tell me, “Oh, how awesome! What are you doing so I can do it?” Uh, no, I don’t think you want to do it. *I* wouldn’t even be doing it if I had a choice. Hell, I’d be eating my usual hefty portions of my home cooking. Healthy, yes, but my portion control was off kilter. It might still be, but I won’t find out until I start eating solids again. Oh, did I mention I get to do the two week liquid diet AFTER surgery? Yeah. But I digress…

I just don’t get it. I don’t know why anyone would be impressed with someone losing that much weight over such a short period of time. It’s certainly not healthy, it isn’t fun, and I will likely never eat broth or Jello again. At least some good came from it though. I have found that I don’t need to snack throughout the day like I used to, that I can live without stuffing my face. Awesome.

So now I have four more days to go. I’m getting mildly excited, and I’m not nervous, but I’m sure that will change Thursday night. I’m just hoping that the surgery center actually calls me on Thursday like they’re supposed to. I won’t be content until I get that call from them telling me what time I’m having my surgery and where I should go in the hospital. If they don’t call me, I’m just going to show up Friday morning at the hospital and start complaining to registration. That could be entertaining since it’s a Catholic hospital and mouth can get foul, especially since I've been starved for two weeks.