Monday, October 16, 2017

For My Sister

So my little sister is turning a certain age today. I can't afford tangible gifts, but I can embarrass the fuck out of her with pictures and this:

My good bitch:

I know you've had some bad years with bad things happening. You have handled it all by fighting the shit out of Life and keeping on, even when I know you don't want to. I am proud of you for all that you do, but mostly I'm proud that I get to call you my sister. I know we have had our differences over the years. I know that we've had screaming fights. I know that people have tried to drive us apart, but we still come back as a united force, knowing that people's scheming will never work on us.

Keep fighting, knowing that when you get weary of Life being a cunt, I'm here to take a baseball bat to Life's head for you. I love you.

-Jess

Now that I've got all your asses sentimental, let's have some fun with a collection of pictures!


Babies


Cool baby


Salute


Dat shirt tho


Kindred spirits


Drunk grown ups

Okay, if I add anymore, she might kill me the next time she sees me. Happy birthday again, sis!

Sunday, October 15, 2017

Blah

I'm too sick to give a shit. I do have a nice long post ready for tomorrow though. So you wait.

Saturday, October 14, 2017

Some Facts

I love these stupid things, especially when I feel like I'm getting the nasty death plague that is going around. Thanks to my little bro George for posting this on Facebook earlier. :)

1. Do you make your bed everyday? I don't make it any day. What the fuck is the point? It's also bad to make up your bed because it traps bacteria and crap between the sheets and blankets. Or at least that's what I tell myself so I can be lazy.

2. What's your favorite​ number? 69, dude!


3. What is your dream job? To be a curator for the Art Institute. Alas, I never finished school and don't have the money or the time to finish a degree.


4. If you could, would you go back to school? Fuck yes. Knowledge is a beautiful thing, and I think that it is seriously lacking in this country.


5. Can you parallel park? If I absolutely have to and there are no other cars parked within like fifty feet of my attempt.


6. A job you had which people would be shocked to know you have had: Uhhh...working with kids. Little fuckers.


7. Do you think aliens are real? Probably, and they're smart enough to stay the fuck away from this planet.


8. Can you drive a stick shift? Yes, I can grab that shaft and move it properly.


9. Guilty pleasure? Bad porn and the musical stylings of Ed Sheeran. Not at the same time.


10. Tattoos? None. Yet.


11. Favorite colour? Sea Green


12. Things people do that drive you insane? Exist.


13. Phobia: Heights and water and death and life and social interaction and


14. Favourite childhood game: Candy Land!

15. Do you talk to yourself? Don't be silly. I only talk to my cat.


16. Do you like doing puzzles? Depends on what kind of puzzle it is. Brain teasers, no. Jigsaw puzzles, yes.


17. Favorite Music? Pretty much everything, except Justin Bieber and Christian affiliated.


18. Tea or Coffee? Covfefe.


19. First thing you remember you wanted to be when you grew up? An astronaut, and then the space shuttle Challenger exploded, and I was content with being a teacher or some shit.

Friday, October 13, 2017

Mrs. Voorhees Was A Victim



Note: this is written tongue firmly in cheek, so try not to take too much out of it. I made the mistake of looking up other entries about this, and boy do these people go in-depth!

Well, since today was Friday the 13th, we did the responsible thing and watched the original slasher movie. While we were watching, it hit me (after 30+ years of enjoying this film): Pamela Voorhees was merely a grieving mother.

As I said in the above note, this subject has been broached before. Hell, I'm not even sure why it took me so long to see it. I know I've always loved the brief glimpse of her character in the movie, but I chalked it up to just loving the villains in general. Then tonight was like a revelation of, "Wait...she's just sad her son died in a stupid way and she probably had no mental health care because all of this took place between 1956 and 1979 and they weren't keen on people who were nuts, no matter what the reason for their lunacy."

Yeah, run on thought. It happens.

Anyway, I guess there was a lot more back story about her and Jason done in later movies (I never progressed past 1989), so there is quite a bit of detail that makes my thought more valid. She married and got pregnant young, to an abusive man, of course. Jason was born with physical issues. Her husband left. She worked where she could, already spiraling into some madness. Jason dies, she goes crazy with unchecked grief and murders the two counselors she held responsible for Jason's death. She was never suspected, so she continued to valiantly try to shut down the camp, eventually resulting in her going to a mental institution for six months. I don't think it helped (understatement).

Then in 1979, the camp was to be opened again and it renewed her grief and rage. Murders happened to people who, in her mind, were still responsible, especially because they were trying to open the camp again. I mean, just another day at Camp Crystal Lake, right? Unfortunately she was never able to gain mental clarity and come to terms with everything because she gets decapitated in the first movie.

And if you consider any of this a spoiler, you can get stuffed. It's been 37 years and it's not my problem if you haven't seen it.

So yeah, just a random quick thought on this Friday the 13th. Sometimes even murder machines need a hug. Like her son does.

But that's a different blog post all together.


Thursday, October 12, 2017

I have mad writer's block. Or maybe I'm just not interesting. Whatever. Hopefully I'm better at this tomorrow.

Wednesday, October 11, 2017

Ehhhhhh

I'm feeling like I'm entering a bit of downward period in regards to my mental health (that or I'm getting sick), so I shall phone it in on a blog post today. Hopefully I'll be in a better frame of mind to write something tomorrow.

Tuesday, October 10, 2017

Body Rebellion, Part Deux

It's probably not the right title for this post, since my body hasn't changed in the past few days. However, I did see the doctor today. While the visit didn't exactly solve all my problems, it did give me a handle on what might be going on.

So in regards to my leg, my doc is not too worried YET. She said that since the issue went away on its own, it could be sciatica (which is what I thought, having dealt with it before). This is the best case scenario. Worst case is a bulging or herniated disc in my back that would be causing the problems in my leg, so if it does it again, I'll be on my way in for an MRI.

In regards to my neck issues, she said that it is great (IT DOESN'T FEEL GREAT) that it's going up my neck into my head rather than down, because that would mean more back problems, and possibly nerve damage. However, this just means that I'm too fucking tense and uptight all the damned time. Well, she didn't say that in those words, but it was implied. So lots of stretching to release the tension, trying to calm down, etc. It may also be related to my teeth grinding (I also said this...I should be a goddamned doctor), so a visit to the dentist is in order. Ugh.

Everything else is relatively fine. My doc is happy with my blood pressure and thrilled that the CPAP is working out so well for me. I do have to go back tomorrow for bloodwork, which was asked for by my cardiologist's office and should have been done weeks ago, but I'm a slacker. She also wants to check my organs for fuckery, since I'm a long term (albeit in small doses) NSAID user, and that shit can kill vital organs.

I also got a flu shot, because fuck the flu. I had that once, and I never ever ever want it again. The boy also got one, because I am one of those asshole parents that likes giving their kid vaccines. Make measles afraid again!