Hoping

I went to the ER today.  I couldn't take it anymore.  The burning, the pain, the general crap feeling...yeah.  I needed help.

When I got there, it was remarkably crowded.  Not a big deal.  I was prepared to wait.  The thing that chapped my ass though was the way the triage nurse treated me.  Now, I go to Mercy because they are kind and they help you to the best of their abilities.  This bitch just made me feel like I was faking it all.  Or that I was there for drugs.  No.  I don't like prescription drugs.  People get too easily addicted to that shit, so I don't play that, even if I do joke about it.

Anyway, she acted like she didn't believe me at all, and was pretty incredulous that I was there again.  I just let it slide.  I felt too much like a sack of rancid goat meat to even bother getting bitchy.  Never mind the fact that the doctor on Tuesday told me to come back if I felt awful.  So nyah, bitch.

After she triaged me, I went and plopped down in the waiting room.  It was quite a wait, but I was cool.  It was just really uncomfortable to sit still.  They called me back for some blood work, then I went and camped in the waiting room again.  After about three hours, I was called back.  Then I sat some more.

My nurse finally came in and said that they were going to give me some pill (fuck if I remember what it was) and some Mylanta with lidocaine in it.  Not sure why there was lidocaine, but it made for an interesting time after it numbed my mouth and throat.  The blowjobs I could have given would have been outstanding.

Oh yes, I went there.

After a bit, the doctor came in, and honestly, I just wanted to rip her eyelashes out.  There were fully an inch long, and those bitches were natural.  While concentrating on her eyelashes, I told her what had been going on, and she wrote down my history with the lap band.  She decided that I should do an upper GI today, just to check it, and then she would have the on call surgeons check it out.  Cool.  I didn't want to fucking trek over to the hospital on Friday anyway.

I was eventually taken over to radiology and set up with xrays and a barium swallow for the upper GI.  Yum.  The radiologist turned the computer screen so I could see that nasty assed stuff snake its way down my esophagus and stomach.  According to him, everything looked fine.  Thank GOD.

I went back to my room and waited for the doctor to come and talk to me.  When she did, she reiterated what the radiologist said.  Then the main doctor came in and talked to me.  She was very nice, and more than made up for the bitchiness of the triage nurse.  So my day ended with me being told that it was bad heartburn and to get some freakin' Prilosec and start taking it.  So I did.

There isn't much more than that.  My side is still twinging with random pains, but I'm not sure what it is.  The Prilosec will take a few days to start working, so if it IS just heartburn, I won't know until Tuesday or Wednesday.

I've made up my mind to just start living again, as best as I can.  I can't keep being down all of the time, but I'm still terrified that this is something major.  I really am going to ask about more Paxil when I follow up on the 30th with my regular doctor.

So right now all I can do is just try and stay stress free and hope for the best.