Whiny Post

I haven't been feeling stellar lately. You might have noticed from my past posts that I've been feeling exhausted all the time. What I haven't really mentioned is that it is getting to the point where I'm just tired from the time I get up to until I go to bed. I feel lethargic, lazy, and just so damned depressed. I have no desire to do anything. Not cooking or cleaning or even paying attention to my family. My mind is a mess. I don't sleep very well at night.

I don't know what is causing this. I don't know if it is all psychological or if something is actually wrong with my body. What I do know is that I just got fed up with it today and made an appointment to have a full on physical. Walking a couple of miles shouldn't wear me out, like it did today. I walked the dog, walked to the bank, came home, ate some breakfast, and then had to go lie down because I was wiped out. I still feel crappy, and I have a million things to do, like putting away the laundry that has been sitting here since Saturday.

I can't keep on like this. I want to be able to get up in the morning and make it through exercise without feeling like it's going to kill me. I want to be able to pay attention to my child and play with him and take him places without lapsing into a coma afterwards. I want to be able to clean my house without having to take a break every thirty minutes. Hell, I just want to be able to stay up in the morning without having to take a nap.

I just want a freakin' normal life. I know I'm never going to be the type to get up and be all bouncy about exercising and being active, but for fuck's sake, can't I have a little bit more energy?