Peace Came To Me

Peace will come to me
Peace will come to me

I'm leaving bitterness behind this time
I'm cleaning up my mind
There is no space for the regrets
I will remember to forget

Just look at me
I am walking love incarnate
Look at the frequencies of which I vibrate
I'm going to light up the world

Peace will come to me
Peace will come to me

I'm leaving anger in the past
With all the shadows that it cast
There is a radar in my heart
I should have trusted from the start

Just look at me
I'm a living act of holiness
Giving all the positivity that I possess
I'm going to light up the world

Peace will come to me
Just wait and see
Peace will come to me
It's meant to be
Peace will come to me
Just wait and see
Peace will come to me
It's an inevitability

-Depeche Mode

Peace. I feel it at long last. After hours of fretting, days of worrying, weeks of wondering, months of fearing, I feel it. Peace. It came upon me without fanfare just a few days ago. It is a tremendous feeling that I will never be able to describe properly.

I want to knock it, to say there is something wrong with me, to say that it’s all a false hope. I can’t. I feel strong. I feel invincible. I feel like I can get through anything without having the doubts and anxiety that usually plague me. I feel like I did pre-nervous breakdown.

I didn’t want to say anything for fear that I’d jinx myself and bring the pain crashing back into my life. However, I can’t stay silent about it. I’m joyful that I feel better. I’m grateful to God that my mind has decided to cooperate. I’m ecstatic that I can go six hours without thinking of gloom and doom, and, if I do, I forget it just as easily as it showed up. I know I am not completely fixed, and I don’t know if that will ever happen, but the way I feel now is an enormous leap forward in all the heartache I‘ve felt.

I feel like crying.